A Very Long Engagement
by Lavender and Hay
Summary: Mr Molesley has a question for Miss Baxter. No series 5 spoilers.
1. Chapter 1

He found her where he thought he would. She was sitting in the boot room, attending to her Ladyship's shoes.

She smiled as she saw him in the doorway.

"Hello," she went on with her cleaning, smiling at the heel of the shoe in her hands as much as she did to him, but he recognised this in her. She couldn't know that this meeting was anything out of their ordinary way.

"I thought I'd find you in here," gently, he closed the door of the room gently behind himself, "I was wondering if I could talk to you. Before you have to go up to get her Ladyship ready for dinner."

"Is anything the matter?" she asked him.

"No, no, everything is fine," he told her, pulling his livery a little straighter before sitting down on the stool beside her, "There was just something-… I wanted to say to you."

She put the shoe down, and wiped her hands on the cloth before her.

"I'm listening," she told him.

"I wanted to say this to you today. Or before today," he told her, "Today is-… would have been, my dad's birthday. I promised myself I'd have worked up the nerve to do this by today, or I don't think I'd ever have done it."

"You of all people shouldn't have to work up a nerve to talk to me," she told him. Her smile was reassuring.

"I know," he replied, "And you're the only person I've ever contemplated saying this to, seriously that is."

She was smiling at him. Something in her look, a glint in her eye.

"Maybe you already know," he wondered.

"I won't know anything until you say what you need to, Mr Molesley."

She certainly knew.

"Joseph," he told her, "Please call me Joseph."

"Alright," she replied, "Joseph."

He took a deep breath.

"Phyllis," he told her, "I do feel as if you already know what I'm going to say. Ever since you got here, well, I don't know. Things have been different, for us all really, but particularly for me. I used to think," he continued, "That maybe I'd get through my whole life and I would never meet anyone who made me feel different. But then, you. And I feel," his courage faltered, just a little. Enough to silence him for a second. But her hand slipped tentatively into his, wrapped their fingers together, stroked the back of his hand, gave him courage, enough to look up into her face and tell her, "I love you, Phyllis Baxter. And I want you to marry me. So I can look after you, and spend my time with you. You say that my life is worth something, well, you've only seen what it's like when you're there. I'm not sure it is without you."

She was holding both of his hands. Tightly.

"Joseph," she murmured, "I don't know what to say," her eyes were shining, "You are worth so much-…"

He wasn't sure how to reply.

"Well," he asked, a little uncertain, and if he was honest, non-plussed, "What is your gut feeling?"

She broke into a smile.

"My gut feeling?" she asked, "Yes, of course, you silly man! A hundred times, yes. But what will we do? We won't be able to stay on here."

"We don't know that," he told her, "There's Anna and Mr Bates."

"But I thought that was because Bates knew his Lordship from the war?" she asked him.

"Well, then," he told her, bolstered by her response, "We find other jobs. There's some money left over from what my dad left me, and the rest is in the bank anyway. We'll be alright. I'll be alright if I've got you."

"And I know I'll be alright if I've got you," she smiled at him, "If you equate marrying me with looking after me, then this has already been a very long engagement."

His thumb brushed over the back of her hand.

"Are you saying yes?" he asked her.

"Yes, I am," she told him softly, tugging her hand from his grasp, raising it to his cheek.

**Please review if you have the time, I'd love to know what you think. **


	2. Chapter 2

**I wrote a kind of part 2. **

"Does it worry you that you've never been with a woman before?"

They were walking the long way back through the fields, their hands clasped snuggly together. Though she asked it out of the blue, she asked it softly. But still, the question surprised him, and he was, inevitably, taken aback.

"Is it that obvious?" he asked after a moment, "That I haven't?"

"No," she assured him, "But I know you. And we're going to get married, so I thought we needed to talk about it. Don't you think it would?" she asked.

"Yes, I think it probably would," he agreed, "I wanted to, but I didn't quite know how to start."

"Well, I've started us off," she told him gently, "It's been weighing on my mind as well. We need to talk about it and I can't imagine they'll give us a moment to ourselves up at the house, so I thought-… Now."

He nodded.

"Yes, you're right."

Their pace had significantly dwindled. They were standing amongst the long grass of the meadow, barely advancing at all.

There was a pause.

"I have been wondering," he told her after a moment, "And I didn't know when to ask. Have you ever-… before?"

"Yes," she replied, "I have."

"With-… the man who sent you to prison?"

"Yes," she told him.

"Was it-… what was it like?" he asked quietly.

"Difficult," she replied, she smiled gently at the disconcerted look on his face, "But that was because I knew he wouldn't give me anything like what I was willing to give him."

He still looked uneasy. Her hand reached for his again squeezing it tightly.

"It won't be like that with us," she told him, "I know it won't. What we have is completely different- I trust you to give me everything you can. And I don't want you to be worried about it, I especially don't want that."

"I'm not worried," his head had been bowed a little, looking at the ground but now he raised his eyes, looking at her, "I trust you too."

She smiled at him.

"I'm glad," she replied, "I don't want to do anything you don't want to."

Slowly, at a gentle pace, they were gradually ascending the incline in the middle of the field.

"That's what I was worried about too," he replied, "Because I thought, that's to say I suspected, that you may have had-… less than enjoyable experiences in the past. Which is admittedly more useful than a complete lack of experience, but even so-…"

She laid a gentle hand on his arm.

"Well, you needn't worry," she told him softly, a smile playing on her lips again, "I know we're going to be alright. More than alright. I know it every time you kiss me."

"Do you?" he asked, a look of such a mixture of shock and pride on his face that she could not help but laugh.

"Yes, you daft man!" she told him, tugging gently on his hand, pulling him closer to her. She tilted her head back so that the brim of her hat did not get in the way as she offered her lips up to his. She felt his hand touching her cheek, holding her face as he tenderly kissed her on the mouth. Her arms wound themselves around his neck and she deepened their kiss.

"I love you," she murmured as they broke apart, "I think we're going to be alright."

**Please review if you have the time.**


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